RETIREMENT PLANS

‘There is more fun in working than in sitting idle at home’ my newly enlightened friend in his newly entered sweet sixties spoke his mind with puffing off his cigar. Otherwise he’d plans rather he’d chewed my hundreds of hours in discussing his plans after his retirement. His topmost plan was to sit in the recliner eat healthy he actually meant edibles he thinks healthy whilst his doctor has other opinion about, drink dry martinis, smoke cigar, watch TV & discuss share market. I were sick of his plans, ‘talk anything but your retirement plans’ I once shut his about to open mouth; after all there is limit to everything.

His dream plan on resting in recliner with a cigar in the fingers has eased out it seemed. ‘How about start working again?’ I was more than anxious to listen him, as he has built up pile of money from his initial days of staying days together empty stomach. He’s always occupied upper echelon in my mind on ‘how to achieve something in life’. ‘No way, enough of that money earning, let’s do something different’ I again clutched his wandering mind. He was really not sure on what to do? Tickling wall clock was ruining his peace of mind earlier too he had same problem with the wall clock but now conversely the bloody time is not moving ahead.

‘Why don’t you guys buy a binocular & see the distant objects instead?’ his wife ridiculed on us both looking at us plunged in serious thought on what to do, how to pass time. Actually we both since our childhood never pursue any hobby which might kill our empty time now. Childhood flew away without trace, adolescence & teens got buried under school & college assignments, studies, results & grades well, we did out bit in those troubled days by catching hold of best & beautiful girls in our college making them our partners forever. Badly entangled in the daily chorus of work we just never realized as when hair got grayed & retirement date reached without inkling.

‘Why not try that too?’ he quipped with winking eye. ‘What do you do with the binocular, search for another star or what?’ I amazed looking at his thick glasses. ‘She fooled us, perhaps she wanted us to move to terrace so that she can get her friends & continue with kitty parties without our disturbance, got me?’ I tried to speak what was their in his wife’s’ mind after all I know her since our boyhood. ‘Whatever let us try this too’. He spoke with rare determination. I found such determination, spilling out of his otherwise clear but not red due to alcoholic effect, only when he has something else in his mind. He bought guitar not to learn but to follow his girl studiously learning violin then. Joined mess other than college canteen only to enjoy weekly feast of non-veg, a revelry then. Religiously bring grocery & vegetable to home when we all play at ground, not to be mothers’ obedient son but to swindle money.

I meekly followed him to buy binocular of good quality. Commissioned it on the terrace the same evening. Equipped with his dry martini, my scotch, ice cubes, his cigar, my pipe, roasted cashews etc. we settled onto the terrace with a good luck wish from our wives. They had rare satisfaction of fooling us in their still beautiful deep eyes, which I’m used to; as at least once a week I get such gesture from her. And it is close to thirty three years of togetherness I’m yet to gauge the loss to me but get an idea that I’m duped by her. It was she only who let our daughter dearest marry her Canadian husband diplomatically fooling her resisting old fashioned husband, that is me.

‘Let’s train our glasses onto moon first till we get accustomed to other heavenly objects’ sipping scotch on the rocks I was excited to see the creators & valleys & perhaps that great foot-print of human being on moon soil. ‘You fool, can’t you see moon with your necked eyes. I didn’t spend eleven thousand thirty four bucks to see moon which we otherwise see daily’ he chuckled with devilish smile. ‘See there through that window…’ I saw & froze with a glass of liquor where in the floating ice cube was melting.

‘Look, age doesn’t matter. If doing so in our teen was a fun & fetched our beautiful wives, what is the problem now?’ he was trying to convince me wiping dew on his glasses with his night suit. ‘Let the bodies’ age, mind is still fresh. At least mine is, how about yours?’ I shook my head in affirmation without my notice. ‘That’s’ it’ his slap on my back was rather bone breaking yet his sock to my head was much surprising & shocking.

‘We are on the terrace, to see the heavenly bodies’ with a particular stress on bodies we found a rare & confidential hobby to pursue. God is great!!!

By

Vijay Yelmelwar