POLITICIAN

‘Seventy percent of the time you are out, out of rest thirty percent time fifty percent of the time you are in bathroom, twenty percent time you are doing Pooja & rest twenty nine percent times you are in meetings’ my new PA was explaining me on his set answers over telephone to the common public. ‘But when do I answer them, they are the one who elected me’ I was getting buried in confusion. ‘It is half percent time sir, you may speak over phone’ a fifty three years old man spoke with hands folded back, head down with eyes searching underworld as if. A pure seasoned man in the corridors of power, a befitting man for all season. Otherwise my mentor hadn’t proposed me of his name. ‘Look, I’ve settled him for one & half percent on your settlements he does. He is very loyal you see’ my mentor whispered into my ears patting my back assuring, he truly had deep interest in me & I had deep regards for him. Otherwise who on earth takes care of ones men like this? I gave him reins for settlements & collection & though new in power not new at all in politics, I took care that the fellow is watched & followed.

‘Started collection?’ one of my old pal chuckled while whispering into my ear at the South Block corridor. He was a cunning lucky guy; his first attempt to LS itself ensured his berth at the cabinet. He only advised me to choose state ministry in defense than go for full post in coal, fertilizers, water resources etc. ‘No exposure, no talks, no interviews. Just collection & mind well, less you speak better it is. For the first term at least you should opt for defense. Later on you may go for ministries with public contact’. He truly had vision; I decided to back him at an hour of necessity. “There are no permanent friends & foes in politics” I got this line printed on the colour printer on silver lined paper & decorated under my glass top. But later removed having sensed, the sheer line is flowing with blood through vessels. Alike, I removed a word called trust from my dictionary. ‘In politics it has no meaning’ our PM spoke to me in private. As it was clear from his Herculean efforts on bundling different large & small regional & national parties together to form a government & make him PM. Everybody must have squeezed his price before signing letter of support. To hell with trust!

‘There is breakfast meeting sir, tomorrow with three major generals, one general, general, French minister for defense & a group of French arms dealers’. PA whispered while putting his paper of agenda on my table before I leave the office in the evening. ‘Why so late?’ I raised my eyebrow in dissatisfaction as there was hardly any time left with me for preparation after attending today’s evening banquet at the Rashtrapati Bhavan. ‘Sir, I’d to have a dialogue with those French, they were insisting on low & again not ready on cash…’ he spoke in as low tone as if I listen to my mind. I grinded my molars & clinched fist, ‘No sir, that won’t help they live far away in France. ‘Cancel the meeting then’ I told him firmly. It was just nonsense, despite having poured millions to get the damn ticket; get elected with so much of hardships even got permanent backache in the name of spondylitis bowing at the feet of every Tom Dick & Harry while begging for votes; securing right berth if not getting chance to make bucks then what? ‘Sir’ the fellow put brakes on my thinking process. ‘They got ready. But they’d make it in pounds’ the man was doing his job. ‘Fix the meeting’ I said plainly, I’ve learnt this tact to remain plain while I get the most.

‘How’s’ our defense, young man?’ the grand old man, epitome of wisdom & supreme commander of armed forces asked me in his unique trembling voice seated in his high chair. ‘Excellent sir’ I gulped saliva while saying so; it was my first time in having talks with such a great soul. ‘I’m taking stock of the situation…’ before I continued with my chatter my elder friend gently pulled me back. ‘Thank you sir…’ saying so bowing in back I mingled into the crowd of greats of the national politics. ‘I told you, do not open your mouth. The President is x ray machine & former international defense analyst & national security adviser. Keep off from him’. My friend had just saved me from my political suicide.

Next day it was big buck defense deal I’d to sign. Secretary for public relations had made me photogenic & TV camera-genic. We smiled without being asked to say cheese & signed the paper with two rupees Reynolds ball pen. While the PA was assuring me with his patented sign of moving his head in particular angle at his right side, of pounds being stuffed into my benami lockers seven seas across long long away from me.

By

Vijay Yelmelwar