CAR

It was truly hard to make the choice; this car is beautiful or that car. On the top of it the cute lass in minimum possible clothes was given the task to hook me up making it more difficult. She was stretching my financial limits beyond my worth in true sense & embarrassing me. Perhaps it was her duties to squeeze the buyer & put him to shame, other than compelling him buy the costliest available car. ‘This has more bhp & torque, see the leg room & elbow room & largest boot in the category…’ her continuous chatter was now making banging noise in to my ears. Just half hour back when I arrived here I’d thought I was the lucky man with such a close proximity with such a beautiful girl, her talks were sounding jingle to my ears. Plus the plush glass showroom, that cool breeze oozing air conditioners, posh couches & polished men & women with meticulously chosen use of words in order to convince, confuse & coerce the customer.

‘What is this bph?’ I chose to get myself clear as it was me who was going to pay the big money. She laughed with her beautiful teeth shut avoiding eye contact. ‘How about the average?’ perhaps I’d shown my true worth to her since all those around laughed even small kid of some customer playing with play car. Leaving my both the questions unanswered she sneaked behind some glass door & vanished leaving me stranded unattended, I got disturbed & thinking of leaving the glass walled showroom after all I still remember having read somewhere ‘customer is the king’. Actually I had other questions too just behind my teeth waiting to spill out like, what is elbow room, leg room, boot, ground clearance, MPFI, rear spoiler, keyless entry….

She left & a sales man of weighing hundred & thirty five kilogram ‘coal black’ complexion appeared from nowhere. Perhaps he was ready, tying pads & gloves the way cricket batsman do, somewhere inside in the hole of his size to tackle customers like me. It was straight way my insult I can never forget. How on earth they can take away such a great damsel & send in the black monster? ‘What for you require a car, sir?’ his sir was adding pinch of salt in the salad of bitter gourd, otherwise I felt he was ridiculing me. ‘What do you think why should one buys a car?’ now her exit had already taken toll of my patience & the fellow of my triple size with his belly touching my flat stomach asking me stupid question. ‘Sir, there are various reasons, say for single use from home to office, for family use, traveling long distances, for business purpose etc.’ monster was mellowing down.

‘I want a car which should be cheap, more on average, sturdy, low on maintenance,…’ perhaps he’d put in his little finger of his left hand into his left ear & shook it for a moment when I’d lost him on sight. Finding even the son of elephant disinterested in me I left the place. I heard they took a sigh of relief, yes indeed I heard! I then decided to use my grey matter however little I received. Logged onto internet, my daughter in sixth has trained me on this, & downloaded the various sites. Whole week I was immersed in cars in each of their minutest details. There were many manufacturers ready to offer their cars viz. General Motors, Ford, Suzuki, Maruti, Nissan, Tata, Mitsubishi, Skoda, Lamborghini, Mercedes, Rolls Royce and what not.

To my amazement, all cars have comparison figures just close to each others say 799, 803, 1403, 1400, 1500, 1504 on cc of engine same for their length, width, bph, torque etc. etc. but price wise hell of a difference. I reached to the conclusion that prices are determined by not the value the car delivers to its buyer car but the perceived worth of their brand in the market. ‘Look’, I called my wife, poor woman since very beginning she’s been my patient listener whenever I talk & vice versa of course. ‘There are two types of cars based on their fuel, diesel & petrol. Now a days petrol cars are modified to LPG & CNG’. Looking at her confused wrinkle on her forehead I clarified, ‘gas & natural gas’. ‘We want petrol, no gas thing’, she issued her final order while I listened patiently.

‘There are three sizes, small size, mid size & big sized cars; bean shaped saloon & sedan. I mean without luggage space, with small luggage space & large luggage space’ I explained in details. ‘Luggage space for what? We don’t often go out, & if we go out long distance there are buses, trains & when ever your office permits we have air travel too. We don’t need luggage space’. Again final decision from the Supreme Court. ‘Then we’ve little choice darling’ I call her darling either in bed room or whenever no body is around & I notice whenever I utter ‘darling’ she blushes. Which wise man in the whole world doesn’t want to stay with a satisfied wife if both are to live up together? ‘This costs…’ before I started talking she cut me short, ‘look we have a son & a daughter to educate & to marry, take care of our parents, think of our retirement; why waste?’ she was absolutely right I shook my in head in affirmation. ‘But the car doesn’t have air-conditioner, no leg room, no elbow room, ground clearance,…’ I was still taking chance if by chance she approves we might have bigger better car. But, the Supreme Court whether at the heart of the nation or at the heart of the husband works on pure logic. She stopped me before I finished, ‘you’ve have not replaced our ceiling fan for last six months the whole summer passed without fan air why do we need air conditioner any way, if we have space to sit inside our legs & elbows will also adjust. And as far as the car runs on ground that’s it. We’ll go for such car only, which is that car?’ she bent herself on the glossy papers I collected turning her hairs back from her cute innocent face.

She was looking just beautiful, better than that showroom girl. Not only because she’s my wife & easily reads my mind but also because she knows better where to spend & why to spend.

By

Vijay Yelmelwar